第一百一十五章 鸭怪奇缘(11)(1 / 2)

狐朋仙友 独坐前轩 1064 字 2022-04-06

“每天让个不男不女的太监堵在床头叫起床,这日子过得真够憋屈的。”

“这才哪到哪儿啊?听师傅说,这做皇帝的,每顿饭能吃多少米饭都有限制。

不但每顿只准盛一碗,这饭还不能超过碗缘,想多一粒米都不成!

师傅他猜测这八成就是乾隆爷老爱夜里挑灯批阅奏折的原因。

因为加班后可以找借口吃一顿工作餐,能多来点汤圆春卷莲子羹当夜宵。”

“我的天!”

所以说过去皇帝每餐只动几筷子就吩咐太监撤席,未见得真是山珍海味吃腻了,八成可能是给气的。

“你们这些贼男女光给朕夹菜却不给添饭,朕吃多了不得齁着么?

“这,这真是太惨了。”

“更惨的还在后头呢!

听师傅说,这宫里招呼嫔妃侍寝时两人在一起待多少时间都有限制,一般都是半个时辰。

超过时间就会有伺候太监扯着公鸭嗓子在门外高声提醒:‘陛下,到时辰了。’”

要是这个太监在门口连喊三遍,屋里却没人吭气搭腔,人家抬脚就踹门……

没错,皇帝依旧不能砍了他出气,因为这也是祖制,怕得就是屋里这皇帝中马上风昏厥过去。

“听师傅说,这就是宫里经常会大量采购‘红丸’之类药物的原因,不然皇帝真有可能到了时辰却交不了差。

不过今日的炼丹技术早就不是汉代可以相比的了,现在的‘红丸’对身体的伤害要小的多。

那天,这位京官就在御书房中见到这样一种东西……”

听杨从循讲,那天这位在御书房泠泠惕惕等候奏对的御史台学习行走在御书案上发现了一盘青翠欲滴的……葡萄!

皇宫大内吃盘葡萄是没有啥稀罕的,可问题是眼下已经是内穿夹袄的隆冬!

这时节雪都盖住树梢头了,怎么可能还有葡萄?

这位御史台学习行走越想越觉得奇怪,于是就趁着御书房里只有他一人的空子,神使鬼差般走上前去

他用手从盘中悄悄捻了一粒青葡萄塞进嘴里,之后立即转身回原位垂首站立候旨。

据这位京官事后回忆,那粒‘葡萄’皮薄无核,里面是一包甜滋滋还透着一股药香味的浆水。

除了不太像葡萄味,滋味还真不错。

总之,这东西肯定不是葡萄,但究竟像什么,他也说不上来。

然而令这个京官始料未及得是,就在他吃了这枚‘葡萄’后还不到一刻钟的光景,就觉得从胃里一下子蹿出一个火团直冲丹田,接着越过丹田一路烧向下体。

也就一转眼功夫,他的那话儿就在这股火的催动下……你应该明白的。

这下可把此人骇得魂不附体,眼下他在书房候见已经有小半个时辰了

皇帝随时都可能撤去早膳前来书房,到时自己这个样子可怎么行礼见驾?

君前失仪,这是杀头的罪过!

得亏当时天气寒冷,这位大人身上套的棉裤又厚。

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